turning a corner
For the first time in a very very long time, I feel like weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I feel like I can finally stop holding my breath and walking on eggshells. I can make plans, I can hug my friends (!!!), I can take trips to see those I love-- I can begin to enjoy so many of the things that I’ve missed so dearly over the last year.
It’s been about a month since we’ve been fully vaccinated, and it has made a world of difference for me- my mental health, my overall wellbeing. [I, of course, want to acknowledge that I am blessed to live in a country where vaccines are available to us while also heeding to the fact that other countries are actively experiencing their own covid spikes.]
In these last few weeks I have seen friends for the first time in over a year, I have met my co-workers IRL (!!!), I have taken my first subway rides, I have eaten out at restaurants, I have booked a cross country trip….and it all just feels so fun and familiar. I am taking baby steps because that's just what works best for me-- eating outdoors, meeting friends outdoors, and, more generally, just giving myself the space to re-acclimate to social gatherings and a budding social calendar. Another plus? Spontaneity! Previously, all ventures had to be prefaced with loads of pre-planning: quarantining, getting tested, with enough time to get the results back in time. This past weekend a dear friend invited C and I to the beach the next day...and well, we gladly accepted the invite. It was the most fun- not only because I spent it with dear friends (and even met a new one), I also truly loved that I ended up at Riis Beach with no plan of doing so 24 hours prior.
I told my coach recently that I’m ready to close this chapter. I’m ready to turn a corner and start anew. Let me be clear-I’m not suggesting nor do I think it would be wise for us to forget 2020. Truthfully, I think this experience will always be a part of me-a part of us-because we are forever changed. Having lost a family member to covid, this chapter will forever be a part of my family’s story (as it will be for many many others). Rather, I’m ready to make new memories, spend time with friends, try new things, go on new adventures, meet strangers (!), and just live life.
Another relic of my pre-covid life: shooting with new photographers. I haven’t shot with another photographer in ages. My last one may have been this beautiful shoot with my beautiful photographer Diana in Grand Central back in January 2020. During COVID, I learned how to shoot solo using a tripod and timer. I was also forced to get creative with locations-shooting in my apartment, on my firescape, on C’s roof. And now, I finally feel comfortable to explore new places and collaborate with new people.
So, here’s to re-discovering the things that once brought us joy, letting go of those that do not (haven't we learned that time is so finite), and embracing this new chapter with gratitude.
Shirt: Vintage//Skirt: via Rent the Runway//Shoes: Enzo Angolini//Bag: Coach// Sunglasses: Dolce & Gabbana
Photos by: Diana Davis
